Tragedy in Aurora (A Little Political)

This morning I heard news about the horrific tragedy in Aurora, Colorado. You can read the article on CNN.com if you want more information. An armed man entered a theater full of patrons who were watching The Dark Knight Rises midnight showing. He wore a gas mask. After he entered, he threw tear gas into the theater. He then proceeded to shoot, killing 12 and wounding 50 people. The  descriptions of terror given by the victims horrified me. They also made me so very, very angry.

What in the world possessed this man to take the lives of so many people into his hands? What made him so disturbed that he felt the need to perpetrate so much destruction? Who made him the person who chooses who gets to live and who dies?

I know that mental illness causes people to do commit atrocities and that, sometimes, we don’t discover the motivation behind such acts. He may not even know directly why he broke. It just isn’t fair. Those people were excited to see a movie that they’ve probably been waiting a while to see. They stayed up all night, waiting in long lines, and enjoying the comradeship that comes with being around other fans. Families, friends, and strangers were drawn closer together because of the time spent in anticipation of the opening of this movie. So much synergy destroyed by a single act of violence.

I have never been one who advocates gun control. My family is from the country. Usually hunting and country go hand in hand. My husband has guns; he was in the military and hunts on occasion. I’ve been around guns for as long as I can remember. I have chosen not to have my own guns because it never really interested me. The thing is, gun safety has always, always been taught and we are doing the same with our daughter. Respecting the power of firearms is the only way to be safe around them. Now, though, I wonder if anyone focuses on that anymore. Should there be stricter rules for owning a gun? Should there be a limit on how many guns a person can own? Should a psych evaluation be required?

This is the third time in my life that I’ve asked these questions. (Political viewpoint coming up, bear with me.) I am not big into governmental control over certain things. Growing up around so many responsible owners of firearms gave me a sense of security. If everyone was like my family then there would be no need to control guns. I am doubting that now. There have been entirely too many instances of mass murder by one person with guns. Where do we draw the line? I am not saying that guns should be banned. I think they are entirely too easy to acquire. I don’t have the answer about how to fix this problem, though I wish I did.

Then I started thinking about what people will say about this tragedy. Right now it is fresh, but in a week or two, it will be over. There will be another event somewhere that makes this one fade. That is when the comments will come, making light out of the situation. I know that humor is a way for people to deal with input that their minds are having difficulty processing. What about those who have lost family and loved ones? This will NEVER be humorous to them. Ever.

I know people who had family involved in the Columbine shootings. One of my friends used to coach swimming there. Her mother worked at Columbine when the shootings occurred 13 years ago. She still cannot talk about it because the pain is so close to her heart. You can see it in her eyes. Our students were babies when the shootings happened. They sometimes joke about another Columbine. It is not real to them and therefore it is a source of macabre humor. They don’t know how much it hurts.

I guess the point of this rambling post is that we should not forget this. There has to be something we can do to prevent events like this occurring. I don’t want to live in a world where fear permeates every thing we do. I refuse to be afraid.

Year 13 Begins

The next few weeks are going to be very hectic for me. I return to work on August 1 and students arrive on August 8. I will be working on getting my classroom set up and planning my first quarter. One of the challenges that I am (very) excited to face is the implementation of 1:1 technology. For those of you who aren’t knowledgeable in educationese, it means that all of my students will have netbooks and the use of textbooks will be limited. The transition will be fairly easy for me because I don’t generally use the textbook anyway and I had a classroom set of netbooks in my classroom next year. I still have to plan and plan and plan (it makes my brain happy). I’ve decided to take my teaching a step further and make my class inquiry based. It is a big step for me because I give up some of the control that I am used to. Thing is, the kids are fully engaged when you give them a choice.

Another challenge that I face is the fact that I will have to work with new people this school year. Because of teacher movement, half of freshman level teachers are brand new to the school. Some are even brand new to teaching. I love that we have fresh ideas, but I am also sad because our group last year worked well together. They knew me and my quirks. They didn’t get upset when I would hide in my room because I needed alone time. Plus, I get terribly shy and anxious when working with new people. I’m either silent or have diarrhea of the mouth and say the stupidest things! Time to retrain everyone (myself included).

One of the aspects of teaching that I love is mentoring new teachers. I like offering them support and helping them make it through the first few years. Teaching is hard and if you don’t have support, you’ll never make it. True words, those. I’ve already met one of our brand new baby teachers (term of endearment, btw). My first impression of him was that he was T.A.L.L. I have no idea how tall he is, but I had to twist my neck to talk to him. He’s an Algebra teacher, but I won’t hold it against him. (J/K. I love my mathmagician friends. They astound me.) It was exciting to hear his ideas for next year. He is so fresh and so hopeful. I want to help him keep some of that as the year progresses.

I went into work yesterday to get the keys to my classroom. Usually I don’t go into work this far in advance. However, I have a new classroom.

I know! First a new principal then new teachers and now a new classroom. Doesn’t anyone understand my brain?!?!

I have 12 years of teacher stuff. At the end of May, I had to sort through scads and scads of resources to determine whether or not I needed them anymore. I ended up getting rid of/recycling 8 big black garbage bags of things I hadn’t used in a long time. I didn’t realize how cathartic it would be to get rid of so much. Even though I pared down my resources, I still had to pack them up to be moved to my new room.

Here it is, in its natural state:

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Before I can even think about planning or the other hundreds of things teachers do at the beginning of the new year, I have to unpack. Things just don’t work unless I’ve got my little nest set up. The room is so much bigger than my previous one AND it has more storage. You know what the best feeling is, though?

I don’t have enough stuff to fill up the storage space! I don’t feel completely overwhelmed with things. Maybe this will help me in the next school year. I’ll have space to breathe.

This year is looking up already!

Oh, don’t worry, I’ll post my classroom when it is finished. I know ya’ll were skeered that I’d forget to show you the beauty of it. =)

Merida: A New Princess?

My daughter and I went to see the movie Brave on its opening day. The first time I saw the trailer, I’ve wanted to see this movie. Even more than I want to see Magic Mike! Inorite? Whodathunk? There’s not even a hawt guy in it (Oh no! I seemed to have slipped into teen-speak right there. Ops. I must be missing my little rapscallions. Apologies, dear non-judgemental readers.). My daughter wanted to see it even more than I did. She would ask to see it every time she saw the movie trailer. We went. We loved it. We wanted to see it again. The girl usually tells me about all of her favorite parts of movies that we see. She essentially retold the entire movie. It was good. If you haven’t seen it, you should.

However, that is not the point of this post.

I started doing some research after the movie to see what others thought of it. I was shocked at some of the responses I found. Many blog posts and articles that had a feminist slant bashed the movie. Here I was, thinking that Merida was a fabulous alternative to the typical swoon-and-wait-for-rescue princess. She takes matters into her own hands. She’s brave, strong, and determined. Merida can take be victorious when faced with danger and stands up for what she believes in. In essence, I loved her and was excited when my daughter began to emulate her.

Apparently I had it all wrong. There are so many things wrong with Merida.

  • She’s a princess (gasp)!
    • Some of the writers hated the fact that she was a princess. (They suggested that she be a serving girl or a toaster or something. A frikken’ toaster! I don’t know about you, but I’ve never really been able to relate to inanimate objects, no matter how likable they are.) *Warning: Nerdiness approaching* At the time that the movie is set, the only women who had any leisure time were those of noble birth. She would have to be a princess in order to have enough spare time to have an adventure.
  • Merida wears dresses.
    • Once again, time-appropriate clothing. A serving girl would have had to wear a dress as well. Not sure about the toaster, though.
  • Her hair is too unrealistic.
    • Ummm… so is Lady Gaga’s but she is still seen as a strong woman. Plus… animated. Duh.
  • She does “boy” things and they are celebrated.
    • Their concept of boy things is shooting a bow and riding a horse. This seems anti-feminist if you ask me. I know plenty of women who are masters at archery and are expert equestrians. Why are these boy activities?
  • She has a simple problem and all she does is have to fix it.
    • If you’ve seen the movie, you know that the conflict in it is anything but simple. Character development occurs in both major female characters. I guess it isn’t conflict enough unless you have to beat down “the man.”
  • There are men in the movie.
    • Okay, maybe this comment wasn’t said outright, but still. I get so tired of some feminists being anti-men. Men are essential to life. Literally and figuratively. I would not be the strong woman I am today without the influence of some of the men in my life. Yes, there are some men who are jerk-faces. Guess what? Some women are jerk-faces as well. Get over the man-hate, please. It ruins my love everyone vibe.

Part of my frustration is that this is a movie in which a young girl stands up for herself and solves her problems with a little help. Isn’t this how we want our daughters to behave? Why in the world should this movie aimed at children be expected to change the world for women everywhere? Let them be children for a while. I was allowed to do so and I turned out okay.

I have never reblogged before, but this made me laugh. Check it out!

I hope I am doing this right. 🙂

Laura's avatarCheesecake Summer

OK… I hereby solemnly swear to try to shut up about Loki sometime soon.

TRY I said… that’s the key word.

So, lately I’ve been cracking up at the god of mischief in this video from MTV’s After Hours –

loki’d from gorgeous anon on Vimeo.

After yelling “LOKI’D” in my husband’s face at top volume for about a day, it struck me, “Why not just play some pranks yourself, Laura?” And then myself replied, “That is the best idea you’ve had all day!”

Well, wouldn’t you know my delight when my husband handed me his phone and asked me to plug it in for him. MWAHAHA, I had an idea.

My first round of Loki’d, I decided to set a calendar alarm on his phone, to go off at 5 a.m. (The hour isn’t bad, we are usually still up at 5 a.m.) I slyly handed him his…

View original post 259 more words

Thoughts about Reaching my XXth Birthday

Today is my 39th birthday. I know. Women aren’t supposed to tell anyone their age. I don’t really subscribe to that thought. I have worked hard to make it through my 39 years and I am proud of that. Plus, I’ve been saying I was 39 all year and thought I was going to be 40 today until I did the math.

I’ve heard the memory goes as you age, but I didn’t think it would go this quickly!

I now have a second year of being 39! Inorite? I get one more year before the dreaded 40, an age where I’ve heard that everything starts falling off (but not the things that you want to fall off– like the middle-age spread). I might have a 3rd year of 39 just to be safe.

Not enough candles, but you get the idea!

In the past week leading up to this glorious day, I’ve done some thinking. I don’t know about you guys, but this is the time when I look back at my year and see how I’ve done. Forget New Year’s Day– that is for everyone else. I’ve got to be different! Oh, side note: July 2nd is halfway through the year. I didn’t know that. My friend told me. I didn’t research it so if I’m wrong, let me know. I’ll probably forget though. Because I forgot I was 38, remember?

This year’s taking stock of my life has been very different from all of the others. Usually I get very depressed and think of all of the things that have gone wrong. I focused on how worthless and imperfect I was. Death loomed ever closer in my mind and I would never be able to make something of myself. I usually spent a whole week alternately crying and getting angry. I hated my birthday and never wanted to celebrate it. Well, this year I did none of that. Okay, that wasn’t completely true. I did cry a little last night, but I think it was more because I was worn out and it was late and I forgot to eat dinner. Probably. Still, it was only about ten minutes long, if that, and I fell asleep right after.

Instead of looking at my life negatively, I’ve chosen to look at it differently. Even thought there were difficult times, I made it through them. Sometimes I learned something about myself. Sometimes I was just happy to get out of it with only a few scratches on my psyche. Amazingly, the scratches were few. I’ve become a much stronger woman because of it. The difference is that I’ve actually been in a state of mind where I could actually see the strength. Part of it I attribute to finally finding the correct melange of medicine. The majority of it, though, is all me. Yes, my meds have balanced my brain chemistry, but I have chosen to do the work to make myself stronger.

Happy birthday to me.

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All photos that are not mine are under a CC license. For more information about this wonderful resource, go to www.creativecommons.org

Cake Photo: Neil T via flickr

Girls Just Want to Have Fun

(The post in which I confess something astonishing)

Let me say this first. I am not a raging feminist, but I do believe that women and men should be treated equally. All people are different and have qualities that could (potentially) make the world a better place. It is one of the wonderful things about humanity. This week I’ve seen so many posts with males flaming females for stepping out of their “gender roles” and broadcasting that they are gamers. Now, we all know that gamer girls have been around since games first began. Just because we have lady parts doesn’t mean that we don’t play. We just haven’t had a medium to share our love of gaming. While there are many, many supportive men out there who love the fact that girls got game, there seems to be a very loud minority who is threatened by this.

My favorite geek girl, Felicia Day (creator of The Guild, “I’m the One that’s Cool,” member of the Vaginal Fantasy Book Club-can’t wait to see who finds my blog searching this- and an all around awesome person), recently created this song/video:

It is full of all sorts of awesome. The sad thing is that little trolls started flaming her for it, saying that girls will never really be gamers and worse things than that. She explains it better in her blog. If you have time, check it out. It made me think, though. I’ve always been accepted as a gamer.

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Confession time (a.k.a. don’t judge, ya’ll):

I spent hours making characters.

When I was younger, I used to sit with my brother and his friends and play Dungeons and Dragons. I played Vampire: The Masquerade on a BBS where I was a sysop. I was a dungeon master, a good one– it is telling stories, after all. I have a huge collection of dice; I love the way they feel in my hands. I loved RPG-ing. It was social and imaginitive and I NEVER once worshiped the devil. Never. It was good for me. It kept me out of drinking/druggy parties that the “typical” teenager participated in.  I wasn’t limited to in-person gaming. Some of my favorite games on my first computer were the Ultima series. I love RPGs, electronic or in person, and I have for as long as I remember. I still do.

I play World of Warcraft with my family and when I need to de-stress. Sometimes reading a book isn’t enough of an escape and I have to attack wee beasties. It is also one of the ways I can keep in contact with my brother, niece, and nephew. We are more apt to have a conversation online than anywhere else. Sometimes I log on just to say “hi.” Weird, right? Once again, it is the social aspect that I enjoy the most. And the stories. And the graphics.

So, there is my confession. =)

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I was always accepted in my group of gamers. I think they kind of liked the fact that I was an actual, real life girl. I have a special place in my heart for those boys. I guess this is why this hit me so hard this week. I have seen so many examples of male resistance to the acceptance of females in gaming. I never realized that it was a problem faced by many of my fellow female gamers. I didn’t realize how afraid these boys are of girl gamers.

When I started online gaming, I would let other players know that I was female. I am not one to hide who I am. Then I started noticing a difference in the way that they treated me. They weren’t mean or anything. They just tried to get me to talk… well… dirty with them. Yuck, right? I  warned them once and if they didn’t stop, I blocked them. It got to a point where I only talked to people that my brother and I knew in real life. It was disturbing, but not enough to make me stop playing.

I figured that my experience may be totally different from the experience of younger girls so I decided to interview my niece. Just so you know, I barely got a C in my journalism class in college so my interviewing skills may be a wee bit less than stellar. It’s not my fault! I just thought important things were important; my professor thought differently. Anywhoo, my darling niece is 13– making my brother really, really old (love ya!). She plays video games and MMORPGs like WoW and she plays them well.

Rilin
my niece’s kick-butt rogue

She raids, does PvP, and battlegrounds. Often she takes other noob characters under her wings and helps them get through tough places. She is the whole package and then some. So, here goes on the interview:

Me: Do people treat you differently when they find out that you are a girl?

Rilin: Sometimes they stop talking to me because of it. They’ll talk to my brother, but not me.

Me: Has anyone ever been mean to you?

Rilin: No, but the “there are no girls on the Internet” joke gets really annoying.

Me: How do your female friends who don’t game treat you when they find out?

Rilin: The ones who don’t make fun of me, but in a teasing way.

Me: What if the boy you liked told you to quit playing? Would you?

Rilin: NO! It is one of the things I really love.

I was happy that she wasn’t being treated horribly. Interestingly enough, while I was conducting this in-game chat with her, a “boy” in the guild was talking about wanting to give a woman a vaginal exam with gloves made out of metal filings. He had no idea that there were females playing. I don’t even think he considered it. Needless to say, I told him that we didn’t appreciate that kind of chat. Unfortunately, it took my 14-year old nephew to threaten him with getting kicked out of the guild for him to stop.

It seems that it is getting worse. Maybe it has always been like this and only now is it coming to light because girls are standing up for themselves. It is so frustrating when women have to fight for the right to be treated as a human being every single step of the way. Perhaps it will disappear because it is being talked about.

My shaman

Oh, if you want to feel a little bit disturbed, search “real-life Barbie.” I found it during my research for this post. I am still getting the heebees.

Friday Funtime (Saturday Edition)

Hello, ladies and gents. It has been a long, but lovely, week. Hubs and I spent our tenth anniversary abroad (by abroad, I mean in Flagstaff, AZ, a three-hour drive from our home, but still!). I swore off the Internet (gasp, choke) and managed to do so most of the time. Yay me! It was a great time with tons of outside walking and what-not. I have great blogging plans for this. There WILL be slideshows. Many, many slide shows. That is a threat promise.

Anyway, when I came home, there was tons of Internet to be had and, boy, did I have it. While it may not be as long as the last one, I did put my heart into it. Enjoy!

Just Because

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Cool YA Site

If you are looking for some YA audiobooks for free, sign up for Sync. Every week during the summer they provide two free audiobooks on the same theme– one is a classic and the other is contemporary.  This week it is The Eleventh Plague and The Grapes of Wrath. It’s definitely worth a look.

Buy me this, Mom!

Yes. This exists. And I want it. A desire that burns with the fire of a bajillion suns. Click on this picture and it will take you to a world where it is possible to cuddle and snuggle and huggle your very own @wilw. If you are getting one for yourself, mind getting one for me? I’ll write a very special post for you because you would be very dear to my heart.

So, that is what I have today. I tried to get my slide show to work correctly, but I couldn’t. Family is making hungry noises and I’ve got to go. I hope today’s Saturday Edition was as pleasing as last weeks. 🙂

Friday Funtime*

I have noticed a trend in my posts. They aren’t exactly the funniest/cheeriest posts. I never meant my blog to be a place where I go and vent. Sooooo, in order to combat that, I am going to try a new type of post. Every week I find assorted things that amuse me greatly. Sharing them with you, my delightful reader, will make me incredibly happy and (I hope) you as well. My goal is to try to do this every Friday, but you know how committed I am.

Just Because

Blog Posts that Made My Day

One of my tweeps, @lahikmajoe, came to the U.S. from Germany to visit Texas. His search for Texas Shaped Stuff resulted in some whimsical pictures featuring, well, Texas Shaped Stuff.

Interested in what the future will bring? @lucysfootball has a great post about it: Welcome to the Future.

I recently found @ibecamemydad through my twitter travels. His post about getting into the mind of a serial messy room offender brought back fond memories.

Finally, this post by @ProfMomEsq about her daughter turning five, Happy Fifth Birthday, made me deliriously happy and made me revisit my daughter’s growing up.

There are so many other fabulous posts that I read, but these really stuck out for me. If you have the time, you should click and read them. They are definitely worth it.

Movie I Want to See cuz… Well… Hawt Guys

This movie is totally not my style. I usually don’t like chick flicks, but, dooooood. This movie is going to be so pretty on the eyes. It doesn’t matter if it is bad. It will be a great chance to objectify men. Woot!

Thanks for stopping by. Have a great weekend!

*Okay. I know that is not an original title. Really, I do. I’m a lazy titler, what can I say?

Eclipsing Post, or Phoning it in

(tee hee… see what I did there?)

On May 20, my fam and I were able to see the annular eclipse from our front yard. I took many pictures, but will only subject you to a few of them. Hope you enjoy! I know we did.

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Reason #127 Why I Teach

Today we were eating a special lunch to celebrate my daughter’s kindergarten promotion and a young lady approached me.

Young lady: Hey! Aren’t you Mrs. F.?

Me: Yes, I am.

Young Lady: You are my sister’s favorite teacher. She talks about you all the time.

The catch? I taught her in 6th grade. She will be a senior next year.

Who says teachers don’t make an impact? Crazy people, that’s who.