Author Archives: Elizabeth

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When a Heart Hurts

Today my daughter and I drove by a cardiac care facility. Natalie right away saw the heart next to the sign and knew exactly what it was. She said, “Momma, is that a place where people go when their hearts hurt?” I replied in the affirmative. She said, “If their hearts hurt, they get in their cars really fast and drive here. Then they lay down and the people fix it so they won’t die.”

“Is that the way it works?” I asked.

“Yes, Momma,” and she paused. “Why didn’t Grandpa come here when his heart hurt? That way they could have fixed him so he wouldn’t have died. I miss him.”

I wanted to run right in to the care facility and have them fix my heart hurt.

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Ripples in my Pond: Twitter and My Donors Choose Project

Right now I am completely in awe of the power of social networking. I recently submitted a project to Donors Choose to purchase a classroom set of Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman. Donors Choose is a place where teachers can post projects and donors can donate as much or as little as they choose. I heard of it through comments on this post by The Bloggess (who is really very sweet, in spite of all her declarations that she is not).

I looked at the website and immediately thought, “Oh, this will never happen. I don’t know enough people.” Then I started thinking of my social media network. I follow some of the most amazing, generous, funny people. I decided right then and there that I was going to do this thing. After all, you never get anything unless you try, right?

So, I spent a couple of days filling out the proposal, stressing over every word. When I submitted it, it came back approved. *YAY* The next step was getting the word out.

Last night I turned into to a human spambot. No… a spamhuman. (Oh great, now I am hearing Monty Python in my head. Lovely day, innit?) I have never been very good at self-promotion. Asking for help makes me feel all funny inside. Asking people for help with MONEY makes me feel like … well, I don’t want to put a disturbing image in your mind. Let me just say that it is incredibly uncomfortable.

My followers were very kind and didn’t jump ship when I started asking everyone I knew to retweet my project.

My twitter friends Amy (@lucysfootball) and @patrixmyth assured me that I wasn’t a spambot. It was good because I was beginning to wonder. Lisa (@lgalaviz), another generous person though she tries to deny it, decided not to retweet it just once, but a million times. If you don’t follow them on twitter, go, do. If you aren’t on twitter at all, sign up, then follow them. It is easier that way.

My heart swelled when pnut from my favorite-band-of-all-time-forever-and-always 311. If you’ve never checked them out, you need to. They are an amazing group of guys and their music is the rockin’est.

Then Neil Gaiman HIMSELF retweeted it. Not only that, but he replied to my request for a retweet! I think my hubby thought I blew a gasket. I was jumping up and down from the joy of the response. I thought I was too cool to react like that. I guess I am a geek at heart. I am embracing that part of me.

All of this ties into the novel itself and the unit that I am going to be teaching. Every action has meaning. If I had read that comment and not done anything about it, I would still be sitting here, trying to figure out how to get a great book for my students to read. I made the choice. The velocity of that choice allowed me to experience this awe-inspiring moment. Because I took this step, my project was funded in less… than… eight… hours!!

To all the donors and those who helped me: Thanks for being the ripples in my pond.

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To post or not to post, that is the question

There is a fabulously written* post about my last visit to the doctor sitting in my draft folder, waiting to be let out and play with the other ones.

This blog post could make me a BLOGSTAR!!**

The big question is, why don’t I publish it? Why haven’t I pushed that button and let it roam free? Those are very good questions. Thanks for asking. Here is the conversation about this that I imagine we would have if we were sitting in the same room.

You: Why haven’t you published this stupendous blog post?

Me: The answer is simple, but complex. Paradoxical even.

You:  >.>  Huh?

Me: I don’t want to lose my job. I am an educator.

You:  <.<  Oh-kay? What does that have to do with anything?

Me: (entering justified– in my humble but accurate opinion– rant) Anything I post is subject to scrutiny. I can’t joke about how I wish sometimes that teenagers weren’t allowed outside or in public when I am around and especially after dark. If I talk about imbibing an alcoholic beverage or, goodness forbid, have a picture posted of me with said beverage, there is the possibility of administrative sanctions. Even though I am of legal age. Swearing in my blog? Heavens no! What if one of my students saw it and decided that it was appropriate? Please understand, though, that I am not one for swearing. However, an occasional swear provides emphasis. Sometimes I like to drop a curse. I have to watch what I write because I could get into trouble. If there is one thing that I hate more than anything else, it is getting into trouble! There are so many teachers out there who have been put on administrative leave or lost their jobs because of these innocent things. I don’t want to be one of them.

You: O.o

Me: Inorite?

Unless I want to blog anonymously (and seriously, don’t we blog to be famous??), I have to watch what I write. Will I get fired if I do any of the above things? Probably not. My district is a good one to work for; my principal is understanding. However, the risk is still there. Because social media is relatively new the rules in academia haven’t been determined. There is no standard that I can follow, no set guidelines to … um… guide me, and no way to know whether or not my post about waiting for my doctor can get me into trouble.

I guess that is one of the reasons why I don’t blog as consistently as I ought to. I have ideas jostling around in my head, fighting to get out, but I worry about what ramifications will occur if I post them. Every post is an act of self-censorship and it kind of makes me sad.

____________________________

*I know this because my mom told me it was fabulously written.

**application of @lucysfootball’s emphatic style (read her blog; it rocks!)

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I think my phone just called me fat

The other day, my little brother and I were having a fascinating conversation during my prep hour. He’s decided to change his major to something that he actually loves instead of something that he is good at but is bored with. I am so proud of him for making this choice. Because my prep hour was about to end, I was texting him to let him know.

My phone does a thing where it tries to predict the word that I will text next. It is very rarely accurate, but sometimes it is helpful. Trust me, this is an integral part of the story. I promise I am not just bragging about having a smart phone that is occasionally psychic.

So I text the sentence “I have to get back to …” My phone suggested my next word be “eating”.

Yeah. That’s correct. Eating.

I don’t think I’ve ever texted the phrase “to eating” in the entire time that I have had this phone. I think my phone was judging me. Seriously. There wasn’t even any food around me. I mean, I know that I could stand to lose some weight, but still. I think I need to trade this phone in for one that is less judgmental.

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A Soft Goodbye

This week has been a very hard week for my family. My father-in-law lost his battle with cancer and was laid to rest.

I realized today that, since he was diagnosed in August, we’ve been living our lives in a daze, knowing that the end was coming soon. We spent as much time as we could with him. Up to the end, he still kept his sense of humor and his mind sharp.

Bill was a man who lived with a purpose. He was shy and took a while to open up to me. When he finally did, though, I was blown away. He had a wicked sense of humor–  he made me blush on many an occasion. I can see where my husband learned humor and I am thankful for it.

Bill was an unapologetic conservative, but it suited him. I remember the chuckle that I got when I looked at some of the books he would read. I remember one being about how to talk to liberals (if you are forced to) or something like that. Needless to say, we didn’t talk politics that much.

There wasn’t a time when I visited that we didn’t watch sports. He watched everything from college sports to professional sports. It was fun to watch him give up the television so his grandchildren could watch their shows. He acted as if he was doing it begrudgingly, but you could see his joy in watching them.

My daughter loves him so much. She is taking this like a five-year old would, but I can definitely tell that the loss is hard for her. It hurts my heart, but I knwo that she will be fine.

One of the things that really struck me was the way he made sure that my mother-in-law was taken care of. He always took such good care of Peggy. This didn’t end with his passing. Because he knew that his time here was almost up, he arranged so many things to help her. Instead of succumbing to despair because of his illness, he faced it head on and with dignity. I hope I can be that strong.

Bill truly loved my mother-in-law. It was apparent in the way that he looked at her and spoke to her. Thirty-seven years didn’t diminish their relationship. I know it wasn’t all sunny, but they took the adversity and made it into a stronger relationship.

Jason learned how to be a husband by watching his father. He takes such good care of me, always making sure that I have everything I need. He supports me in everything. I know that Jason learned this from watching his father interact with his mother. I am so thankful to Bill for being a good model for my husband.

I know that this post is a bit rambling, but I really needed to say these things.

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NaNoWriMo, Part Deux

As a matter of fact,
I *AM* crazy

So, this year I am going to participate in NaNoWriMo again. Crazy, right? Especially since I am taking classes and teaching and all of the other stuff that is going on in my life right now. I figure that I might as well push myself over the edge of sanity and embrace my inner basket case. It’s going to be swell.

I am going to alleviate some of my stress, however, by continuing the novel that I didn’t get to finish last year because of Natter’s broken leg. I love my novel and think that it deserves to be finished.

Even now, I am trying to figure out how to get these 150ish words into the novel I’m writing. It’s awesome. Wish me luck!

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Uniformity

As a teacher, I have always been supportive of school uniforms. The thought of not having to worry about what my students are wearing seems to be a little bit of heaven to me. It has nothing to do with wanting kids to look the same. It has everything to do with not having to tell a fourteen year old to wear a shirt that doesn’t show EVERYTHING.

Now I am a parent of a kindergartner who goes to a school that requires uniforms. When I found out about the policy, I was thrilled. We wouldn’t have to worry about what to wear every day. As far as I was concerned, it was the ideal situation all around.

Flash forward a quarter into the school year.

My delight at school uniforms has quickly waned. I miss picking what to wear every morning with my daughter. I miss being able to listen to her opinion on what is fashionable. In fact, I am starting to feel resentful about this loss of experience with her. As a parent, I should be able to choose what my child wears.

The principal of her school said at the beginning of the school year that she is planning on having a poll to see what the community wants to do with the policy. If someone would have told me that I would vote no on uniforms, I would have told them they were crazy. Isn’t it amazing what a change in perspective does to a person?
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BORDERS Closing

As I am sitting here in front of BORDERS, waiting to meet my family, I am struck with a sudden sense of longing. This store has been a part of my life for many years. I’ve bought books I loved and some I hated. I’ve had countless cups of tea while writing in the coffee shop. It has been a refuge for me when I needed to get away from everything.

Now I sit in the empty parking lot. It is humbling to know that things can disappear so completely. In retrospect, I’ve seen it dwindle. First the music left. Next, the video section. It was so gradual, though, I didn’t realize the ramifications of the slow disintegration. A part of me thought it would be there forever.

I was a part of their demise. Buying online is less expensive and more convenient. However, BORDERS did not help themselves by becoming more innovative about the way they interacted with their customers. Their online presence was spotty and difficult to navigate. They didn’t change with the times.

As educators, we are all at risk for “going out of business.” If we don’t stay innovative in our approach, our students will stop paying attention. Meeting the needs of our customers while maintaining high quality product is essential. If we can’t keep up, we’ll fade, just like BORDERS did.

So, farewell, my favorite bookstore. I miss sitting in you and being surrounded by books. I hope I can learn a lesson from your closing.

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My Last Weekend of Summer Vacation

This is the last weekend I have as a mom and a wife only. Come Tuesday, my classroom will be filled with the chatter of brand new freshmen and a few repeat students. It is a bittersweet weekend. I love spending time with my family, but I cannot wait to embrace this new group of kiddos and become a part of their support structure.

The great thing is that I have had quite a few of these students before as seventh graders. When I check my rosters, there are little pictures of them. There are so many of their little faces that I recognize and it fills my heart with happiness. I can’t wait to reacquaint myselves with them and to get to know the others whose faces are unfamiliar.

My summer has been filled with so much professional development. ISTE, Anita Archer, Teach like a Champion, posts from my PLN on Twitter and Google+. Honestly, I sometimes feel overwhelmed by all of the new ways that I have to reach my students. I decided that this is the perfect time to reflect on what I’ve learned and set goals for myself.

I am going to keep my goals SMART this year. If I do so, I will be able to develop a good plan to achieve them. So, here goes:

  1. I will keep my word wall up to date by posting my words in the morning on the day I teach them.
  2. I will give my students more choices about how to learn their objectives. There is more than one way to get to mastery.
  3. I will create authentic audiences for my students, even if it takes more time to find them.
  4. I will faithfully preassess before every unit. I do this for many of my big units, but I sometimes just wing it on others. 

These are my goals for this year.  I will revisit these and see how I’m doing.

What about you? Do you have any goals that you want to focus on for this upcoming school year?

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Being off the Grid

I recently had an opportunity to go completely off the grid for a week. Well, it wasn’t an opportunity, really, more like a forced exclusion. I visited my father in the middle of Missouri– three hours from St. Louis and three hours from Kansas City. It was out of network for my smart phone and not even on the map for Internet access.

That’s right. I went a whole week without Facebook, Twitter, email (all 7 of them), and all things cloud-based. Crazy, I know!

At first, I was in a panic. How would I keep connected with the world? How would I blog about what I was doing? How would I get my online class started? I was like an addict, freaking out about my next “fix”. However, being the trooper that I am, I soldiered on.

I left my smart phone in my room (gasp).

The first day was very hard. I kept on clutching my pocket, seeking the rectangular security that I usually found there. Feeling the absence of its assuring weight was alien to me. I felt a little lost, especially when I wanted to share with my friends what we were doing. It felt strange to not tell people what was happening on my vacation. The thing is, I found myself paying even more attention to my family and sharing with them.

It was AWESOME!

Mighty Fishermen!

Because I was forced to let go of my Internet “leash,” I realized how much I have been missing in the present moment. It has made me think about how inundated I was getting with extraneous information. It made me realize that so many of my students probably feel exactly the same way.

When I returned from my vacation, I wasn’t as frantic to get online. I deleted my Facebook and Twitter apps from my phone. It has been three weeks, and I still don’t miss them. I still check both networking sites daily, but I am not checking every hour. It is kind of nice to not feel the urge all of the time.

Have you ever been disconnected unwillingly? If so, how did you deal with it?