Zombie Kitteh Will Eat Your Face

Awww. Such a cutie-pie!

This is Frodo, our new-ish kitten. He looks innocent, doesn’t he?

Appearances can be deceiving.

One night (morning?) at 3:00, he crawled up next to me on the bed purring loudly. I love snuggly cats but I’ve not had one in a long time so this was exciting to me. His little whiskers tickled my faced as he moved closer. I figured that he would just rub against me and then settle down for a good sleep. I laid there, waiting to see what my cuddly, itty-bitty kitty would do next. Then, I felt a tongue in my nose, literally. He was trying to find something in my nostril with his tongue. It was not at all enjoyable; cat tongues are quite rough and- yuck- in my nose! I reached up to pull him away but, before I could, something startling happened.

The little turkey bit my nose! Not just a little nip, oh no, not for this fella. He was full on gnawing on the tip of it. The zombie kitteh was trying to eat my face!

Luckily, I was awake enough to not throw him across the room. I gently took him and placed him on the floor by my bed and tried to go back to sleep. This is when I discovered that my little Frodo furball is a zombie. He is not the typical zombie in search of brains, though. He mindlessly seeks nostrils and the tips of noses. Obsessively, even. It usually takes about five times removing him from the zombie-feeding zone before he gives up. It has been four weeks and he still does it three or four times a week.

Have you ever had a zombie pet? How long did it take for the face eating to cease? Do you think the rules from Zombieland would help? Cuz I’m getting a little bit desperate.

I’ll see you in your nightmares!

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2 thoughts on “Zombie Kitteh Will Eat Your Face

  1. Yikes! Tongue-in-nose does not sound appealing at all.

    Both our cats used to claw our bare toes while we slept. I came up with the idea of doubling up a heavy duty quilt and draping it across the existing bedspread and over our legs and feet. They still claw at our feet, but only occasionally now and they can’t draw blood with the quilt/flak jacket in place.

    Sorry you’re going thought this, Elizabeth. I hope Frodo will settle down/come back from the land of the living dead.

    • Lol. He’s a good cat and getting better at not eating my face. Now if I could just stop him from waking me up at 2:30 in the morning for petting. Pet ownership is so much fun!

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